Dear you,
I honestly thought you were the one.
Maybe not.
I did what I think I had to. I ended our friendship. Because I couldn't stand being so close to you - enough for your smooth promises to caress me and lull me into a false security of hope - but yet still so far from from your mind, your heart. I couldn't stand it anymore, always hearing about her, and her telling me about you. How you're both so in love with each other. You've only known her for less than 3 months, and you say you intend on marrying her. I've been by your side the whole time. Best friends. Pinkie promises, the whole deal? What did everyone else have that I didn't?
I'm sorry that I wasn't.
And honestly, I tried to stop this feeling for you, because I didn't want it to screw our friendship. I didn't. I cherished it, maybe more than you tell me you do.
But.
There. I said it.
But you know what. I would be lying.
The word crush is pathetic when used to try explain what I felt for you.
However I will not claim to have loved you. Because the word love is too big.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." 1 Corinthians 13:4.
But who wiped all your tears when the big shot - the one who pretended to be macho and big and strong all the time - broke? You told me you needed me, at the same time, you always hurt me, always pushed me away. Who stayed by you when everyone else left? Who laughed with you through the good times and held you through your worst? Who stayed up with you all night because you couldn't sleep even though i had tests the next day? Who dragged her sorry butt to go jogging with you just because you had a bet with your mates about who would get abs first? Can you honestly say you've cared for me even half as much as I have you?
Maybe I AM pathetic.
I often wonder.
It's not like you're perfect. Off the top of my head, I can list so many more guys who are more...worth it than you. My other friends often tell me, "My dear, you can do so much better. Please, don't. he's not worth you."
And I know you're not.
I know.
I tried to stop. I did.
But you didn't help. Your words...
"I love you...deep down, a part of me really does care for you..."
"You're my best friend, you mean so much to me."
"Don't ever leave me. I don't know what I'm to do without you."
"You know, when I'm with her, sometimes, all I think about is you and how I just want to laugh and enjoy and oh man, you're just, like my breath of fresh air you know."
That last one is just greaaaattt.
Hi. My name is Shannon. And I am minty fresh.
You're my best friend. But I have to end this madness. It's driving me insane. I had to tell you. I had to. Not because I even had a chance. You're my best friend, i know exactly what I'm getting myself into. I know exactly what kind of girls you like, and knew which one you liked now in fact. I'm aware you will never reciprocate my feelings.
So I'm telling you, for me.
For me to stop.
For once. I'm going to do this for me.
And not care how this will affect you.
But I was scared.
I would lose you.
In the end. I told you.
It took so many tries for the words to come out. I even remember you sort of running across the street from me cos you told me I was making you nervous and that you didn't want to hear what I had to say after all.
But in the end. I told you.
Smiles.
You asked me if I was serious.
If you were dreaming.
Haha.
You asked me why I was telling you this.
"Because I can't be your best friend anymore. Because I can't keep hearing about you talking about her, and her talking about you, whilst I feel the way I do."
And you actually had the nerve to go "Ouch. That must have hurt."
I told you that I wanted this to be over. Our friendship. Everything.
You didn't meet my eye.
"Don't leave me..."
"Good-bye" And I walked away from you into the dark waiting night, alive with opportunities, and opened doors and happiness.
I felt so alive! So free! So liberated! So happy!! I started smiling. And laughing!
"You have suffered enough and warred with yourself.
it's time that you've won"
God doesn't give you the people you want.
He gives you the people you need
to help you, to hurt you, to love you, to leave you
& to make you into the person you were meant to be.
So I want to thank you. Thank you for everything. The good, the bad, the happy and the ugly. Thank you for helping me grow. Thank you for helping realize that I deserve better, and you deserve someone better than me too. Someone who can be your TRUE friend without this stupid complicated feeling in between. Someone who would be able to change your life, and make you care in the way that I never did.
And most of all, thank you for all the memories. And for what its worth, for being my best friend.
You've changed so much. I guess that's what happens.
I wish you knew how much you've changed me.
I wonder if I've changed you, if your life is different because of me..
because mine's different. My God, you taught me so much,
and now we don't even talk to each other
I guess that's what happens.
It's been nearly a week.
And I feel ontop of the world!!
We lose people we love because they are meant to love someone else
We lose them because we are destined to find somebody else.
It is a simple fact that is sometimes hard to accept
Stop saying your sorry. You wanna know something?
I knew. I knew you didn't feel that way about me. I knew and I still let it happen
because, well, I figured that one night with you was better then never.
So, will you stop saying you're sorry? Because you didn't know better, but I did.
Randomly, she bites her lip, hiding the picture in her mind. Randomly, she smiles, she remembers every word you said that night.
You were never a waste of time, you were just a harsh realization that I could do better.
(Girls. That's the most true line I've heard)
You’ve made a lasting impression, i hope you know. But don’t take it personally when i tell you, you need to leave.
You need to go and just get out of my head, out of my heart. Because as far as i’m concerned you’re the only one who's ever been there, the only one who's stayed and ever will be staying. no matter how hard i try, i can’t deny this- you've always had my heart, even when you didn’t want it, or when i didn’t want you to have it.
It's always been yours.
(But I'm going to change all of that)
Leaving someone behind means you only want the best for him,
even if it means swallowing the sad reality that the best just isn't you.
Be thankful for every heartbreak, for they were planned.
They come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.
Their purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life... and you do.
You've been on my mind for a while now.
And honestly, you're quite heavy. Please get off.
I know you think of me as just a friend, and that crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you'd ever consider. But I have to say it ... I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are.
I guess its because I can't help but to remember everything. I mean, you see somebody and you think about all they've ever said and done. The good and the bad. It all comes back to you, and it feels so right and hurts so bad all at once.
You can always tell when two people are best friends because they're always having way more fun than it makes sense for them to be having.
When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly.
Girl, don't let him walk all over you. you need to wake up and realize that this boy doesn't deserve your love. you need to grow the strength to break free, because you deserve someone so much better.
so now its up to you
if you want me in your life,
you'll put me there.
if not, then this is goodbye.
Sometimes you just need to cry & be sad. You need to break down & be torn apart. You need to learn how to pick yourself up & put yourself back together. Sometimes, the only way to be happy is to give into sadness first. Cause without sadness, there’s no happiness; you would never learn to smile.
One minute you're closer
to someone than anyone in the
world, the next minute you're
never going to see them again.
I cant help but think somewhere inside of you, I'm there. Somewhere between liking me & loving me & everything in the middle, You got scared. The tingling & the butterflies terrified you.You didn't know what could of happened & what couldn't. Call me crazy but i think you are with her because you know she doesn't have the same effect on you like i do. Each time you touch her, you dent feel a thing, every kiss means nothing. You hold her hand just to look cute, but me? I think i mean alot more to you than meaningless kisses & empty feelings. I dent think you can runaway from that feeling forever, I think you're just going to eventually have to be okay with the fact that i make your stomach flip & your heart skip. Eventually you'll realize its the best feeling in the world, hopefully it doesn't take too long because I'm not waiting forever
Maybe I'm scared,
scared that the person that has meant so much to me for so long, might actually
be falling out of my grasp...and there's nothing I can do to stop him.
And in some way, I think I recognize that I will never be fully over you,
and that part of me will always love you.
But most of me understands that this doesn’t work,
and I need to move on to be happy
You never promised to stick around, so I don't know why I expected you to.
I guess I just wanted to believe you were better when everyone knew you weren't.
Don’t let a few rips in your heart keep you from loving at all.
Look, I’m going to find a way to be happy, and I’d really love to be happy with you, but if I can’t be happy with you, then I’ll find a way to be happy without you.
You must make a decision that you are going to move on. It wont happen automatically. You will have to rise up and say, ‘I don’t care how hard this is, I don’t care how disappointed I am, I’m not going to let this get the best of me. I’m moving on with my life."
— Joel Osteen
If you're brave enough to say goodbye, you might just be lucky enough to get a new hello.
So this is it huh?
The end.
My best friend. This is goodbye.
And its hello to a new beginning.
Love,
Me
